Wednesday, April 28, 2010

I am in love with my best friend of the same sex. Advice please!!!!

Hi, recently i've been having feelings fore my best friend. We are both female and the same age (18). I think about her all the time. I don't have sexual feelings, but I have the urge to kiss her and just touch her. We joke about being lesbians all the time but it's clearly a joke between friends. She has told other friends that if she were a lesbian, she would choose me.

I am not gay but i do get 'girl crushes' but i feel that this is so much more!

What should i do? Keep it to myself? Make a move after a drink? I'm so confused!I am in love with my best friend of the same sex. Advice please!!!!
I think you should talk to her. It's best to get your feelings into the open and know where you stand with her. If she is a good friend and cares about you then she will understand what you are going through and be there to help you through it.I am in love with my best friend of the same sex. Advice please!!!!
u r experiencing 2 feelings most likely. first, you are curious and second, probably lonely. don't ruin a good friendship just because of weakness but, think about the fact that she would choose u if she were a lesbian. she might b curious also. it's really difficult to tell somebody else how to test the waters. if she is a true friend and u approach her more than that, either u 2 will have a great relationship or have a closer friendship because u can share these feelings. otherwise, if she gets mad, she isn't a true friend.
I think you're confusing yourself more than you need to be. Either you like the touch of her soft skin and you want more or you don't. If you are curious then definitely test that. However, it's best to test it with someone else besides your best friend. That way it will not be awkward if you're not attracted to women. Plus, if you figure it out for yourself she will reveal if she's interested or not.

Oh by the way, the whole drunk thing is not the best plan but I would so try it=)
I know how you must be feeling and If I was you , I'd say something like...I think I'm developing feelings for you but I won't try anything if your not ok with it. It seems to me that you do actually really like her and it's not just a ';girl crush';. It's really up to you but If I was you , I'd tell her because after all she is your best friend and whatever you tell her she is always going to understand and love you for who you are , know what I mean? Hope it all works out.
As long as you're not having the sexual feelings about her, then I don't think you're turning lesbian. Maybe you're just feeling closer to her and showing more affection through small gesture touches. You should probably talk to her about this.
This is very common amongst best friends...all the love gets thrown in a pile, gets confused with sex, etc....chill, nothing going on here but love of a friend, we are just so used to love leading to sex, it is normal to wonder what the hell is going on! Peace and love, Goldwing
hell make the move after a drink.. haha. no talk to her really.. It's the best way to understand.. what your feeling and explore it hell maybe together.. I was once in love with my best friend and she was the best girlfriend I've ever been with this is common..
Can't say that's happened to me lol. But if you're really feeling this way maybe when you guys are out havin fun drinkin or somethin (so incase she gets weird use that as an excuse) just tell her how you feel, like it's more than friendship..see where she stands kinda thing.
It's clear that you love her if you weren't initially attracted to her. You should definitely tell her or make a move, and yes, a little drink probably would help - but not too much eh ;)
Dont mix any moves w booze . If stuff happens , the girl may later say , forget it I was just drunk . Try not to worry . Best of luck -
Game on!
Hi Bex, I have just been speaking to a freind who is in a kind of simillar situation (only thing is her other mate is actually lesbian) but do you seriously think that she feels the same way?

It is obvious that she is a good friend of yours and are you ready to take the risk of losing that over something you aren't actually sure of? When do you actually feel the urge to kiss or touch her? maybe you just feel infactuated by her and this could not even be a gay matter.

I suggest exploring yourself first sexually, keep this freind AS A FRIEND because you should not risk losing them if it isn't your cup of tea in the end! Try talking to other lesbians, the internet is a good place to talk about things like this. Ask people about the first time they were attracted to somebody of the same sex and compare your situation.

I hope you do find your way, and I hope you make the right desision!

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