Wednesday, April 28, 2010

My father is getting remarried - and I'm serving as best man... only I'm his DAUGHTER. Advice, please!

Are there any other ladies out there who've ';stood up'; for their fathers at a second wedding? I expect to fulfill some typical ';best man'; duties, like make the toast at the reception and to stand up for him at the ceremony and sign the wedding certificate... but have some reservations about what is appropriate and what is not. I certainly won't be planning a bachelor party or wearing a tux... but, I do not want to wear a bridesmaid's dress at the ceremony either. I would not feel comfortable in the style that's been selected, and as I'm representing the groom's family, I feel it would be more appropriate for me to coordinate my outfit with my father for the day. I planned to go shopping with my future stepmother (so she can approve) for a very simple dress in the same color family as the rest of the wedding party - is it considered acceptable for me to have my own ';look'; since I will certainly have my own duties that day?My father is getting remarried - and I'm serving as best man... only I'm his DAUGHTER. Advice, please!
I think thats awesome! You should go shopping with your stepmom so she can have a say also...or at least to make her feel that way. Why not just a black dress? More than likely the other grooms men will be wearing black tuxes, so its only right that you are wearing something that matches. Just a normal black dress.

And why do I feel so gay having input on this question? haha...I just think its cool that he asked you to do this.My father is getting remarried - and I'm serving as best man... only I'm his DAUGHTER. Advice, please!

it is not uncommon in this day and time for a female to be a best person in a wedding. there have even been times that a guy has stood up for a woman. just learn what you have to do and try to do that.
Your dad basically want you to be part of the wedding. Don't disappoint him. Get yourself a pant-suit. You'll look very smart and cool!
that is absolutely lovely, yes pick your own look that is coordinated in color......and you should feel so special your dad, picked you!
A dress that matches your father's tux or the groomsmen's tuxes would look best in pictures. Make sure the dress can accommodate the same flower type as your father's. Other than that, look your best! And have as much fun as you can. Remember the groomsmen are there to help, so use them as much as you can (the trustworthy ones) to help out with the stuff like paying the minister, tipping the DJ, all that jazz.
I say if they are paying for the dress and it is their day then just go along with what they want. When and if you ever get married then you can decide all those things and boss people around too : - ).

You can just tell your Dad what you do and do not feel comfortable doing. If they don't not plan on having a traditional wedding then all the duties you mentioned don't have to be done traditionally by a best man either. You Dad must have a guy friend he's known for a while so maybe he can plan the bachelor party, etc. Also many people who are older and have a 2nd or 3rd marriage don't even bother with one anyway.
Sounds like a good plan to me. You'll be standing on his side for the ceremony (I'm assuming) so it only makes sense to match him. Hope it goes well!
Seeing as how you are filling a traditional role in a non-traditional way, I say do what you want as long as your family approves. I think its a great idea to go shopping with your future stepmother and coordinate your dress with the groom's side. Have fun with it! As far as I am concerned, there is no etiquette for a female best man, so make up your own.

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